No Joke

Last night I went out looking for a laugh. It was long after midnight and as usual I was restless. Soon I was slipping into step with the semi-ambulatory crowd, clumps of drunks moving in algae blooms. Most times I ooze easily, stopping to watch the action or stepping into bars that lure me with music, but not last night. I had a mission, I was hunting Leonard.

The first time I met Leonard I’ll confess I did not notice him until he spoke, “Want to hear a joke?” asked a bald man weighing down a flimsy camping stool. He brandished a cardboard sign that read ‘Jokes’. “No thanks,” I said, and rushed away. Not because I don’t like jokes, more of an automatic response. But that was a long time ago and in time I fell into the habit of posting up beside Leonard because to watch him was excellent spectator sport.


3 thoughts on “No Joke

  1. Everyone needs a Leonard in their life.
    I once spent Thanksgiving with a man that had gotten caught with a person’s decapitated head in the front seat of his car. He told stories of dating a relative of JF Kennedy, running guns for Castro..stashing thousands of dollars in a wall in a hotel in Kansas City..he said he wore a dirty brown coat most of the time and he carried nearly $50,000 in cash sewn inside the coat. He had to stash it in a motel in Kansas City and was never able to retrieve it. Yes, of course I asked what motel.

    He was also a suspect in the killing of Jerry Litton presidential candidate…yes it was a plane crash:) He never said if he was or was not involved. But I know that he was suspected of wrongdoing.

    I know that he spent many years in the Missouri State Hospital in Fulton Missouri for murder. He got pulled over with a pesky head and no torso in his front seat. That can be confirmed but about running guns for Castro and dating a Kennedy..I have no reason to believe that he was lying but I will not swear to it being the the truth. He admitted to the decapitation..not too many ways to explain away a head in your car ..I guess.

    I still wonder what hotel he stashed the money 🙂

    When I met Tom he was in his late 50’s. He had emphysema to the point where he would get winded walking up the stairs.

    I am not sure if he is still alive but he went back into the Hospital(for the criminally insane) in Fulton after being convicted again of murder in the 1990’s. This time he was accused of strangling someone from the backseat of a car. Though he claims that he does not remember..and I believe he did not have the wind to do it he was none the less convicted.

    I talked to him more often than just that Thanksgiving dinner..even got drunk with him a couple of times. But he did break bread with my family one Thanksgiving.

    Nice slice of life Christina,


  2. Thanks lovely Monty! Lazy Days & Crazy Nights might have to be the title of my next book!
    Oh I just looked that up!!

  3. These beautifully written snippets into your life always make me giggle and leave me wanting more. The endearingly eccentric loons that you encounter almost daily in Key West are hilarious!!

    So good to have Ron back too – posting his comments. I really missed him.

    Keep telling us of your lazy days and crazy nights Sweet Pea. xxxxxxxxx

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